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Literature Text
Chapter 5 – A Friend Like Me
“Oh, my head.” You blinked, your sight beginning to focus in the dark cave you lied in. Memories flooded back to you, as you quickly sat up and looked to the entrance. What was once the mouth of the cave was now just a wall of sand. You then remembered why the cave collapsed. Emil. “I’m trapped and it’s because of that two-faced son of a-“
You felt a tug on your shirt and looked down to see you were sitting on Kiku. You quickly stood up and backed off.
“Oh, I’m so sor-“ You stopped when he held something out to you. It’s gold surface shimmered as you took it into your hands. “The lamp… I didn’t give it to Emil and that means…”
You slowly begin to rub the lamp. Nothing was happening and you were beginning to get confused, until you saw a thin trail of smoke began to come out of it. Seconds later, the lamp began to shake and glow brightly. A boys figure formed in front of you out of the smoke, until...
“How long have I been in there?” An accented voice asked. The smoked cleared to reveal a familiar Norwegian dusting himself off. He messed with his curl for a second, before looking to you. “You must have been the one to summon me. May I ask your name?”
“Uh, ___-“
“___, well congratulations. You have found yourself a genie. Though I like to indulge in my real name, Lukas.” Lukas bowed, before pulling out a set of notecards. “Let’s see introductions, done. Big light show blahblahblah. Oh, hey, Kiku.”
He took notice of Kiku and they both shook hands/tassels. Lukas flips through a few more cards.
“So, you are my master and I am here to fulfill your wishes. But only three! Don’t even think of asking for more, because I won’t.” He threw the card aside. “Going to skip the song-“
“Wait, song? No! No! I want to hear this!” When was anyone going to hear Norway sing a song about being a genie?... That’s right, never. You had to take this moment.
“Please, no-“
“I can just toss your lamp back.”
“… Screw you.” Lukas sighed and snapped his fingers. The note cards disappeared and the lighting in the room seemed to change. A spotlight seemed to hit Lukas as he began. “Well Ali Baba had the forty thieves. Scheherazade had a thousand tales, but master you’re in luck because up your sleeve you got a brand of magic never fails!”
He waves his arms making forty thieves appear, all of them surrounding you. Suddenly, it seemed that your arms moved on their own, as you knocked out all the men with just your fist.
“You got some power in your corner now. Some heavy ammunition in your camp. You got some punch, and kick, some cut and how? See all you got to do is rub that lamp and I'll say-“ Lukas forced you to rub the lamp, before appearing in front of you in a more dramatic way. He was now adorned in a waiter outfit (cue fangirl squeals) and holding a notepad. “Miss ___, dear, what will your pleasure be? Let me take your order, jot it down.
“You’ve never had a friend like me. Life is your restaurant and I'm your maitre’d! C'mon whisper what it is you want. You’ve never had a friend like me.” He then exploded (literally) and reappeared alongside three other doubles of him. They all began to trim your hair, give you a manicure, etc. You then appeared in the most comfortable chair ever, surrounded by treasure and some (sexy) men. Everything disappeared, as the room began to fill with some sort of pastry. “Yes miss, we pride ourselves on service. You are the boss, the queen, the shah.
“Say what you wish, it is yours! True dish. How about a little more Baklava?” You were then lifted up onto some columns and you quickly hopped across them, as they crumbled down. You jumped off and landed on a cushion, and found Lukas holding it. “Try some of column 'A', Try all of column 'B'. I'm in the mood to help you.
“You’ve never had a friend like me.” He and everything disappeared, until he reappeared in the center of the room. His hands began to glow a deep green. He then directed his hands at you, as green spirals appeared at your feet. A strange energy seemed to come from the circles, because it seemed to levitate your hair and sleeves of your shirt. “Can your friends do this? Do your friends do that?
“Do your friends pull this out their little hat? Can your friends go poof! Well look here. Can your friends go Abracadabra, let her rip and then make the sucker disappear?” Fire erupted around you and formed into three hot guys, who danced around you a bit (which was pretty sexy), before Lukas snapped his fingers making them disappear. “So don't you sit there slack jawed, buggy eye. I'm here to answer all your midday prayers.
“You got me bona fide, certified. You got a genie for a charge? The affairs! I got a powerful urge to help you out, so what you wish I really want to know. You got a wish that's three miles long, no doubt.” Lukas made a certificate of sorts appear, but you couldn’t understand it because it was in Arabic (or was that Norweigan?). Before you could actually try to translate the fine print though, it burst into flames in front of you. “Miss ___, madam, have a wish or two or three. I'm on the job, you big nabob.
“You’ve never had a friend, never had a friend. You’ve never had a friend, never had a friend. You’ve never...had a... friend... like...me! You’ve never had a friend like me!” While singing Lukas had created the three (sexy) guys, again. Four dancing elephants and camels, and giant piles of gold. You stood all amazed, until everything disappeared into one giant cyclone. The cyclone dispersed, revealing Lukas in the middle of it, looking annoyed, as he held a sign that said, “Applause”. “You owe me, big time…”
“Oh, my head.” You blinked, your sight beginning to focus in the dark cave you lied in. Memories flooded back to you, as you quickly sat up and looked to the entrance. What was once the mouth of the cave was now just a wall of sand. You then remembered why the cave collapsed. Emil. “I’m trapped and it’s because of that two-faced son of a-“
You felt a tug on your shirt and looked down to see you were sitting on Kiku. You quickly stood up and backed off.
“Oh, I’m so sor-“ You stopped when he held something out to you. It’s gold surface shimmered as you took it into your hands. “The lamp… I didn’t give it to Emil and that means…”
You slowly begin to rub the lamp. Nothing was happening and you were beginning to get confused, until you saw a thin trail of smoke began to come out of it. Seconds later, the lamp began to shake and glow brightly. A boys figure formed in front of you out of the smoke, until...
“How long have I been in there?” An accented voice asked. The smoked cleared to reveal a familiar Norwegian dusting himself off. He messed with his curl for a second, before looking to you. “You must have been the one to summon me. May I ask your name?”
“Uh, ___-“
“___, well congratulations. You have found yourself a genie. Though I like to indulge in my real name, Lukas.” Lukas bowed, before pulling out a set of notecards. “Let’s see introductions, done. Big light show blahblahblah. Oh, hey, Kiku.”
He took notice of Kiku and they both shook hands/tassels. Lukas flips through a few more cards.
“So, you are my master and I am here to fulfill your wishes. But only three! Don’t even think of asking for more, because I won’t.” He threw the card aside. “Going to skip the song-“
“Wait, song? No! No! I want to hear this!” When was anyone going to hear Norway sing a song about being a genie?... That’s right, never. You had to take this moment.
“Please, no-“
“I can just toss your lamp back.”
“… Screw you.” Lukas sighed and snapped his fingers. The note cards disappeared and the lighting in the room seemed to change. A spotlight seemed to hit Lukas as he began. “Well Ali Baba had the forty thieves. Scheherazade had a thousand tales, but master you’re in luck because up your sleeve you got a brand of magic never fails!”
He waves his arms making forty thieves appear, all of them surrounding you. Suddenly, it seemed that your arms moved on their own, as you knocked out all the men with just your fist.
“You got some power in your corner now. Some heavy ammunition in your camp. You got some punch, and kick, some cut and how? See all you got to do is rub that lamp and I'll say-“ Lukas forced you to rub the lamp, before appearing in front of you in a more dramatic way. He was now adorned in a waiter outfit (cue fangirl squeals) and holding a notepad. “Miss ___, dear, what will your pleasure be? Let me take your order, jot it down.
“You’ve never had a friend like me. Life is your restaurant and I'm your maitre’d! C'mon whisper what it is you want. You’ve never had a friend like me.” He then exploded (literally) and reappeared alongside three other doubles of him. They all began to trim your hair, give you a manicure, etc. You then appeared in the most comfortable chair ever, surrounded by treasure and some (sexy) men. Everything disappeared, as the room began to fill with some sort of pastry. “Yes miss, we pride ourselves on service. You are the boss, the queen, the shah.
“Say what you wish, it is yours! True dish. How about a little more Baklava?” You were then lifted up onto some columns and you quickly hopped across them, as they crumbled down. You jumped off and landed on a cushion, and found Lukas holding it. “Try some of column 'A', Try all of column 'B'. I'm in the mood to help you.
“You’ve never had a friend like me.” He and everything disappeared, until he reappeared in the center of the room. His hands began to glow a deep green. He then directed his hands at you, as green spirals appeared at your feet. A strange energy seemed to come from the circles, because it seemed to levitate your hair and sleeves of your shirt. “Can your friends do this? Do your friends do that?
“Do your friends pull this out their little hat? Can your friends go poof! Well look here. Can your friends go Abracadabra, let her rip and then make the sucker disappear?” Fire erupted around you and formed into three hot guys, who danced around you a bit (which was pretty sexy), before Lukas snapped his fingers making them disappear. “So don't you sit there slack jawed, buggy eye. I'm here to answer all your midday prayers.
“You got me bona fide, certified. You got a genie for a charge? The affairs! I got a powerful urge to help you out, so what you wish I really want to know. You got a wish that's three miles long, no doubt.” Lukas made a certificate of sorts appear, but you couldn’t understand it because it was in Arabic (or was that Norweigan?). Before you could actually try to translate the fine print though, it burst into flames in front of you. “Miss ___, madam, have a wish or two or three. I'm on the job, you big nabob.
“You’ve never had a friend, never had a friend. You’ve never had a friend, never had a friend. You’ve never...had a... friend... like...me! You’ve never had a friend like me!” While singing Lukas had created the three (sexy) guys, again. Four dancing elephants and camels, and giant piles of gold. You stood all amazed, until everything disappeared into one giant cyclone. The cyclone dispersed, revealing Lukas in the middle of it, looking annoyed, as he held a sign that said, “Applause”. “You owe me, big time…”
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Lol, was anyone expecting him?
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denmark would've been one hell of a genie but norway as the genie is pretty funny ngl
Imagining his monotone face singing this song is hilarious